This Can't be Life Read online

  “Hey. You feelin’ all right?” Her eyes looked sad. I know my girl. I can tell when something is wrong.

  “I’ll tell you later. I feel fine, though. Just always some damned drama.”

  “What’s going on now, Simone?”

  “What happened?” Stacey asked, walking up from behind Simone.

  “I’ll tell y’all later. I don’t want everybody in my business. We’ll talk, don’t worry.”

  “All right, Monie. I don’t know how much more I can deal with!” I said.

  “Shit, me, too.”

  “Hell, me three!” Stacey chimed in, handing me a bottle of Pellegrino with a slice of lime pushed through the small opening.

  “So, what we doin’ today, Pookie?” Stacey asked, taking the clip out of my hair and gently running his fingers across my scalp.

  “I don’t know. It’s definitely time for a touch up. I think I want some soft layers. What do you think? I’m tired of my hair being the same length all over. It’s so boring,” I huffed.

  “Oh, now you tired of it? Girl, we been tired of it! We been tryin’ to get you to do somethin’ different to your head for too long, but you didn’t want to listen to us,” Stacey said, sounding appalled as he handed me a hair magazine. “Look through that and I’ll start your retouch. Let me know if you see anything,” Stacey said, in his soft voice that held just the right amount of bass. He placed a Zanex strip around my neck, then proceeded to drape a smock over my lap, pulled it up over my chest, and snapped it behind my neck. In his dark brown Fendi sandals, tan cargo pants, and chocolate colored v-neck tee, he looked stylish but comfortable and ready to tackle my head. While he applied base cream around my hairline and on my scalp, I looked through the hair magazine.

  From my seat at Stacey’s station, I had a clear view of Simone who was applying spray oil to a woman’s tracks to remove the bond weave from her head.

  “Damn, that didn’t even look like a weave,” I whispered to Stacey.

  “That’s ‘cause she be in here every damned week gettin’ it done. Her husband is paid and she don’t do shit but go shoppin’ and come get her hair done. Simone be chargin’ her ass up, too. Let me tell you, girl. One time, her husband dropped her off to get her hair done and when he came back to pick her up, I was walkin’ down the street comin’ back from eatin’ at California Chicken. That man was lookin’ me up and down. I’m talkin’ ‘bout starin’ and lickin’ his lips and droolin’ and shit like that. You won’t believe he actually stopped parkin’ that big ass Bentley to follow my every move. You know I was so disgusted. So, when I walked in the salon, next thing I know, here he come walkin’ up in here. I didn’t know that was her damned husband at that time, so I’m thinkin’, this old rich bitch is followin’ me! I was about to go off, ‘cause you know I don’t play that follow me shit; hell, I wasn’t givin’ him no play outside, so ain’t no need to follow me inside. You know I don’t like me no old ass shribbled up dick, and I don’t need no suga daddy. I got enough suga in me for everybody in this joint.” He was barely in the middle of his story and had me crying laughing, as usual. “Talise, before I could say anything, he told Monique to let his wife know that he was here, all the while this queen is still lookin’ me up and down. I almost fell on my ass.”

  “No, he didn’t!” I said, as tears of laughter spilled down my face.

  “You know I don’t lie, Talise. That man’s as gay as Sisqo’s ass. Shit, she probably know he is, too, and don’t give a damn ‘cause he paid.” I could not stop laughing and, of course, he kept on.

  “What y’all laughin’ at?” Gina, one of the other stylists that had a booth in the salon, asked from her station where she was doing a straw set on a girl that looked about 18 and 50 pounds underweight.

  “My wannabe suga daddy,” Stacey replied, winking and tilting his head in the direction of Simone’s client.

  “Oh,” she replied, laughing satisfied that she already knew what we were gossiping about.

  “Anyway, he’s a big ass queen and you can easily tell, too. Hell, it probably ain’t no secret. Oh, my goodness, let me tell you the capper! The next day, why’d somebody send me three dozen red, long stemmed roses with a card sayin’ ‘you’re beautiful’? Girl, wasn’t a name or nothin’ on it, but I know it’s him. Shit, last Tuesday the motha fucka sent me a diamond Piaget watch. Humph, I wasn’t gettin’ shit ‘til after the day I saw his ass literally droolin’ over me a couple of weeks ago. It has to be him.”

  “Shut the hell up, Stacey! Did you keep the watch? Wait, why am I just hearing about this punk?” I asked excitedly, elbowing him in the gut. I was pissed that I had been left out of the loop. He hadn’t missed a beat, applying the relaxer to my hair.

  “I ain’t no fool. Hell yeah, I kept it! I ain’t givin’ shit back! That damned delivery boy had a security guard with him. Simone didn’t tell you?” he asked, dramatically. “You know I be havin’ a lot of shit on my mind, girl.” He continued, not waiting for an answer to his rhetorical question. “Anyway, I took that shit straight to an appraiser. You know that motha fucka appraised for $30,000? I put that shit in my safe in case some hard times come and I need to sell that bitch. What I look like walkin’ around with a $30,000 diamond watch on my wrist? Hell, somebody would rob my gay ass with the quickness. I ain’t no fool…you all right? It ain’t burnin’, is it?” he asked, after he finished applying the relaxer to my new growth. He then began to lightly part and run his comb through my hair, working the relaxer through the kinks closest to my scalp.

  “No, I’m cool. So, you haven’t seen him since that day?”

  “You know, I thought I saw his ass on Santa Monica Blvd that same Tuesday that the watch came. Me and Gail—you know butch Gail?” I responded by shaking my head yes. “Well, we was on our way to this new bar and I had just parked in the parking lot next to the old Peanuts night club—damn, I miss that place. I had some real good times there. Remember, we used to be up in there all the time?” Stacey asked, and continued before I had a chance to answer. He was on a roll, telling his story and just took a small detour around it, but I knew he’d start right back where he left off as he always did. Stacey never forgot what he was talking about when he went off on his tangents. “Anyway, I could’ve sworn I saw his ass drive by, but maybe I was just being paranoid. I know he’s gonna surface one day ‘cause you don’t just give somebody a $30,000 gift and not expect anything in return. I’m not naïve, nor do I have stupid written across my forehead…come on, Tali. Let me rinse this shit out before all your hair falls out,” he joked.

  I sat down at the shampoo bowl as he tucked a white, terrycloth towel in my smock.

  “Lay back, sweetie,” he crooned, as I rested my head in the curvature of the shampoo bowl and let myself relax. Neither of us spoke a word as he shampooed my hair three times, scratching and massaging my temples on the third wash. It felt so good I didn’t want him to stop.

  “If I’m scratchin’ too hard, let me know. You know I don’t know my strength sometimes,” he chuckled.

  “No, that feels so good. It’s perfect,” I moaned. Stacey rinsed out the shampoo and applied deep conditioner to my newly relaxed hair. Then he snapped a plastic cap around my head and sat me under the dryer.

  “I’ll be back in five minutes. You gettin’ a pedicure?” he asked, looking down at my toes.

  “Not today. I just gave myself one a couple of days ago. Will you hand me that hair book I was lookin’ at?”

  “All right, but you might want to rethink that pedi, girl. Looks like a three-year old painted your toes,” he joked, as I looked for something to throw at him before he walked away.

  I opened the magazine to the page I’d folded and started to look for a style. Simone sat her client at the dryer behind me before coming to sit down next to me.

  “I have so much to tell y’all, girl. Al came by this morning,” she said, shaking her head back and forth.

  “What did he say? Is he all right?”

  “
I don’t know, Tali. It seems like some major shit is goin’ on. He said he’s leavin’ the States for a while. He left me a package and…damn, I’ll tell you later,” she said, rising to respond to the page she received from the front desk.

  I was heading east on Melrose to Larchmont with my hair blowing in the wind. I was more than happy with Stacey’s cut. It was layered, but still hung effortlessly past my shoulders and down my back in big loose barrel curls. I was heading to do some shopping at a couple of boutiques, hoping to find something new and cute to wear on my date with Malachi when my cell phone rang. Happy that it was my mother, I immediately pressed the talk button.

  “Hi, Mommy,” I said, enthusiastically.

  “Hey, baby. Where are you?” My mom asked, sounding like something was on her mind. She wasn’t her usual cheery self.

  “On Melrose. I just left the salon. What’re you doing? Is something wrong?”

  “I’m not doing much of anything right now. Just got back home from getting my nails done,” she said, answering the part she wanted to.

  “Where’s Daddy?” I was suspicious. Her avoidance of my question hadn’t gone un-noticed.

  “I don’t know, Tali,” my mother said, in an exasperated tone.

  “Mommy, what do you mean you don’t know?” I asked, trying not to panic. What she was saying was beyond my comprehension. My mother always knew where my father was and I could bet money that he knew where she was at all times, too.

  “Why don’t you come out here? We can have lunch and go to South Coast Plaza.” That meant she wanted to talk and that I probably wasn’t going to like what she had to say.

  “Okay, I’m on my way,” I said, as I made a right on La Brea.

  “See you when you get here…and be careful.”

  “Okay, Mommy,” I said, as I hung up the phone and sped south on La Brea to get to my mother. Something told me that she was going to tell me something that I wasn’t prepared to hear, something I knew I’d probably never be prepared to hear.

  Simone

  I plopped into the seat at my station and took a deep breath. It felt good to be back after being gone for what seemed like months. Everyone had gone for the evening and Stacey and I were the only ones left in the salon.

  “How ya feelin’, Pook?” Stacey asked, using his term of endearment that Talise and I heard on the daily. It was either Pookie or Pook, and it was reserved for Talise and me only, so we felt special.

  “I’m good. How ‘bout you? Wanna go get a drink or something?”

  “Hell yeah, you know I do. I’m hungry, too. Call Tali and see where she is,” Stacey said, walking to the bathroom. I picked up the cordless phone hanging on the wall by my station and dialed her home number.

  “Hey, Tali, what’re you doin’?” I asked, in a chipper voice.

  “Nothing, girl. Just resting. I went to the house after I left the salon.”

  Noticing the sad tone of her voice, I asked, “what’s wrong? What happened?” I held my breath, bracing for the bad news that was sure to come. I could feel it in my gut and my gut never lies.

  “Girl, Mom and Dad are getting a divorce,” Talise said, breaking down in tears.

  “What? They told you that today?”

  “Yeah. Mom said that she isn’t happy any more and that Daddy is never home, so he must not be happy, either. She’s looking for a condo in Long Beach. Don’t tell her I told you. She said she wants to tell you herself.” Talise cried.

  “Okay, I won’t, but, Talise, you have to stop crying. Stacey and I are about to come and get you. Are you dressed?”

  “Yeah, I’m still dressed from earlier. I came home and just got in my bed and haven’t moved since. Where we going? I’m hungry and need a drink.” I could hear her moving around and was glad to at least get her out of the bed.

  “Let’s go to Benihana in the Valley. We’ll be there in 30 minutes so, by 9:00, be downstairs. And quit crying, Tali. It’s going to be all right,” I said, trying to convince her, as well as myself. I felt like lying down and crying with her. The Miles’ have been the only parents I’ve known. I even call them Mom and Dad, so this news was devastating to me as well.

  “Okay, I’ll try. I’ll be outside,” she said, blowing her nose into the phone before I hung up.

  “I told Tali we’ll be there by 9:00,” I stated, as a single tear rolled down my left cheek. “Man, Stacey, Mommy and Daddy Miles are getting a divorce.”

  “Shut the fuck up! What in the hell is this world comin’ to?” Stacey asked, looking as dumbfounded as I did. “Let’s go. I’ll drive because you too emotional to be behind the wheel with me in the car,” Stacey said, as he grabbed his jacket and headed toward the back door of the salon.

  “Shut up!” I yelled after him, playfully. “Let me get my purse from the office and make sure the front door is locked. I’ll meet you at the car. Oh, and Stace, can you call Benihana and see if they can reserve a table for three alone? Otherwise, we can go to the Geisha House. I don’t feel like sitting with a bunch of strangers tonight.”

  It took close to 30 minutes to get to the popular Japanese restaurant in Encino. We always took the longer drive to get to this one. It was bigger than the one on La Cienega in Beverly Hills and, in my opinion, the food tasted much better. We walked in the restaurant and were asked to wait to be seated, so we went to the bar and ordered drinks. Talise ordered a Cadillac Margarita, Stacey, his usual Long Island Iced Tea, and I ordered a double shot of Don Julio straight up in a snifter. I needed to take a load off and tequila always did the trick.

  We sat in silence for a while as we sipped our drinks and waited to be seated.

  “Al signed the deed to the salon over to me,” I stated, breaking the silence. They both looked at me like I was crazy.

  “Did you say he signed the deed over to you?” Stacey asked, in a very disconcerting tone.

  “If he signed the deed over to you that means that you own the property the salon is on then, right? The whole damned building!” Talise said, looking puzzled.

  “Exactly, Talise. That’s what I’ve been waiting to tell you guys all day. He came to the salon this morning at around 6:00. I could tell something was wrong with him. I just don’t know what. I’ve never seen Al before 12:00 in the afternoon in all the years I’ve known him. He looked like he was in some deep shit and been up all night. I asked him if everything was okay, and of course, he said yeah.” I was really worried about my friend, but I knew time would reveal what was really going on with Al.

  The host interrupted me by telling us our table was ready. He guided us to the back of the restaurant where our waitress was waiting to introduce herself. The three of us were ready to order. We knew the menu like the back of our hands.

  “So, what happened after that? When did he give you the deed?” Talise asked, after our orders were placed.

  “Okay, let me see. Where did I leave off?” I asked, gathering my thoughts. “Okay, so after he left, I noticed a manila envelope on the front desk. I picked it up and went back to my office to open it. Inside, was a letter saying that he’s not coming back and that he’ll be in touch with me as soon as he can. He said that the less I know the better and to shred the letter after I read it. And there was the notarized copy of the deed. But, what bothers me the most is, if something does happen to him, how would any of us know?” I asked, shaking my head in disbelief, not really expecting an answer.

  “Damn, what is this world comin’ to?” Stacey asked for the second time today.

  The waitress returned, placing appetizers and sake on the table in front of us.

  “So how is your mom doin’? Is she sad or anything?” Stacey asked Talise.

  “No. She seems normal, I guess, like nothing’s happening. I don’t know how long this has been going on.”

  “Hell, I would assume not that long. When we were over there a couple months ago they were all lovey dovey like they usually are. This doesn’t make any sense! Did you ask her how long she felt like this? I�
��m going over there tomorrow,” I said, swallowing the lump in my throat along with a shot of sake.

  “I couldn’t even think straight. I’m surprised I found my way home.”

  “And Dad wasn’t there?” I asked Talise.

  “Nope. She said he’s been gone for a couple of days.”

  “What? You know what? I don’t even want to talk about this right now. All I know is that I’m going over there. I have one client in the morning and when I’m done, I’m going straight there.”

  Mommy and Daddy Miles were my parents, as far as I was concerned. They threw me birthday parties. Daddy Miles taught me how to drive and took me to buy my first car. Mommy Miles helped me move into my dorm room and even when Talise went away to school, I spent almost every weekend with them. They treated me no differently than they had when Talise was around. It was as if I was their daughter and I couldn’t love them more if they were my real mother and father. Through middle and high school, Mommy Miles was the one that took me school shopping and dropped us off at football games and winter formals. I could go on and on about all the things Talise’s mom and dad have done for me. Other than my father, whose memory I keep sacred, they are the only parents I know.

  Shortly after the waitress brought our salads and soups, the chef came to the table to begin preparing our food. With every bite of the savory shrimp, chicken, steak, or lobster that was consumed, a piece of the pain was replaced temporarily. I could really see how people ate when they got depressed. That really made me feel better, I thought as we sat there stuffed, with empty plates in front of us.

  “I don’t know about y’all, but I can’t go home and go to sleep with my stomach this full. I’ll probably wake up in the morning about 10 pounds heavier,” I said, rubbing my belly.

  “I can’t wait to see my bed. It’s calling me.”

  “You just got out the bed, Talise, and now you want to get back in it? I’m with Simone. There’s no way I’m goin’ to bed with all this food in my stomach. We need to go dance it off. What y’all think about that?”