This Can't be Life Read online

  Before the Miles family came into my life, I just existed, going through life wishing each day was my last. Talise was confident and happy and genuinely wanted to be my friend. I thought I had died and gone to heaven. The first day we met, she took me to her house after school. From that point on, I only left when I had to go home and get fresh clothes. My self-esteem grew and my confidence lifted as the Miles family showed me so much love. By the time we hit the 10th grade, I was a force to be reckoned with — I was a fly girl. Mommy Miles would take us to South Coast Plaza where we would shop at Bloomingdales and Saks. Our gear was so fly the chicks didn’t even know where it came from. While they were in the Guess store or shopping at the Fox Hills Mall, we were in Donna Karan and Versace, loving life.

  After I graduated from high school, I received my trust fund. I immediately moved out of my mother’s house completely and into the dorms at USC. I rarely spoke to my mother after that, just as it had been when I was growing up. We were practically strangers.

  That’s why I couldn’t understand why she was here, acting like she cared so much. She can’t be fake with me. I know how she really is inside; her heart is made of stone and she wouldn’t give a damn if I died. Her being here made me wonder if she had a life insurance policy on me and was coming to see if I just might die. She only cared when she could benefit.

  My mother pretended to go find the doctor so he could give her my “prognosis,” but I knew she was really just taking this opportunity to be in the hospital around doctors. If I know one thing about my mother, it’s that she is still looking for a husband to take care of her. She’s always on the hunt for a rich man. I was hoping she would leave sooner rather than later, before I really told her how I felt. I knew the hate that I had for her in my heart couldn’t be good for me, but it sure was easier to hate her than to love her, especially when she didn’t love me back.

  The ringing phone jolted me out of my thoughts. I grabbed the receiver off the cradle.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey, girl. How you feelin’?” Talise asked. I was happy to hear my friend’s voice. Maybe she’ll talk me out of cursing out my mother.

  “I’ve been better. Just about to lose my mind ‘cause my crazy ass mother is here trying to act like she gives a fuck.”

  “Damn, girl, don’t say that.”

  “No, I’m serious, Talise. You know how she is. You’re just being nice because she’s my mother, but you know that she doesn’t care about anyone but herself.”

  “I hear you, girl. Don’t trip, though. I’m sure she won’t stay that long.”

  “Yeah, I hope not or I’m going to have her ass escorted up out of here. Where are you?”

  “I’m at the office. I’m about to leave, so I was calling to see if you wanted something to eat. I know you’re not eating that hospital food, unless Deon had something delivered for you?” she teased. “Is he still there? I really like him for you, Monie.”

  “He left earlier…and I haven’t even had an appetite with this woman hanging around here. I swear it’s like having a stranger here and she’s my mother. Where you gonna get some food from?”

  “I was thinking about LaLa’s. How does that sound?” she asked, knowing damned well that that was one of my favorite places.

  “Oh, that sounds sooo good.” I gave her my order, mouth watering just thinking about how good it was going to taste.

  “Should I bring your mother something?” Talise asked, jokingly.

  “Hell naw. Her ass is about to get up out of here,” I laughed.

  “All right. I’ll see you when I get there.”

  “You are the best, Talise!” I hung up the phone as my mother walked back in the room.

  “That Dr. Edmonds sure is cute. You better get his number before you leave this hospital. He doesn’t have a ring on his finger, either. I already checked. Too bad he’s a little too young for my tastes,” she said. At 5’10, my mother stood an inch taller than me, and that’s about the closest similarity. My mother has very light skin and, as of recently, wears her hair in a very short style.

  “Your hair is cute. Who cut it?” I asked, trying to break the ice a little bit. I was tired of feeling so much anger toward my mother.

  “Debra over at Celine’s on La Brea. You really like it?” she asked, smoothing it down with her right hand.

  “Yeah, she did a good job. Of course, I could do better, but hey. How long you been wearing your hair that short,” I asked. The last time I saw her it was hanging to the middle of her back.

  “For about six months now. I really like it, too. I catch a lot of men with my hair like this. Who were you talking to on the phone? Whoever it was sure improved your mood.”

  “That was Talise. She’s bringing me something to eat.”

  “Oh, that’s sweet of her. How has she been?”

  “She’s fine.”

  “Who sent you all these tulips?”

  “A guy named Deon Bradford.” I said, before I could think twice about telling her the truth. I knew she would recognize his name, but didn’t know how she’d react.

  “Thee Deon Bradford?”

  “Yeah,” I answered, nonchalantly. It wasn’t a big deal to me, although I knew it would be to her.

  “Oh…” she said, curtly rolling her eyes. “I need to be going now. I’m meeting a couple of friends for a late lunch.” Just like that, she was back to being her cold hearted self again. She picked up her purse and started walking towards the door.

  “Feel better,” she said, without a hint of sincerity behind her words. “I’ll call you in a couple of days to make sure you made it home. Oh, and before I forget, our family reunion is next month. I expect to see you there,” she said, and walked out the door.

  Talise

  I was so emotionally drained that I decided to take three days off from work. With today being Friday, I wouldn’t be seeing that place again until next Thursday. I definitely needed some time away from everything and everybody. The couple of days that I spent in the hospital with Simone had my stress levels way higher than normal. I was relieved that she was being released today because I couldn’t imagine spending another day in that hospital. Thank God for Deon. Without his suggestion to switch to a larger room, I would’ve been spending three nights on that uncomfortable pullout bed.

  I pulled into the parking garage of the hospital and took my ticket. As soon as I turned the corner to the second floor, I saw someone pulling out of a parking space right by the elevator.

  “Thank you, Lord!” I whispered. He knew that I didn’t feel like driving around looking for a parking spot. I pulled into the space, feeling just as lucky as could be, when I noticed someone waiting at the elevator. I hurried and grabbed my handbag out of the backseat, trying to move quickly to make the elevator, when I realized that I didn’t have my cell phone. Deciding to leave it and get it later, I opened the car door, pushed the lock button from inside, got out of the car, and closed the door too fast to realize that my keys were sitting on the damned passenger seat.

  “Lord, have mercy!” I whispered, putting my hands over my face and my elbows on the roof of my silver convertible.

  “Are you okay, Ms. Miles?” I heard a familiar voice ask. I turned around to find Dr. Edmonds staring me in the face.

  “I locked my keys in the car,” I replied, trying to keep myself from getting too upset.

  “Do you know the code to your security system to unlock the doors?” That was a stupid question. If I knew the code to unlock the doors, I wouldn’t be standing here looking like a fool.

  “No, I never memorized it.”

  “Sorry. Dumb question. How about Triple A?”

  “No,” I answered, feeling stupid.

  “Don’t worry. I have it.” He sat his briefcase on the ground parallel to his right foot, pulled his wallet out of his back pocket, and began thumbing through it until he found the card.

  “No, Dr. Edmonds, you’re just getting off of work. I’m sure you’re tired. I
’ll call a tow truck and pay for it. I don’t want you to waste any more of your time on my stupidity.” He looked at me with so much intensity that it sent a shiver up my spine.

  “I wouldn’t care if I’d worked 72 hours straight. I’m not leaving here until your keys are in your hands and that beautiful smile I’ve been lucky to see these last few days is back on your face.” I was speechless.

  Dr. Edmonds pulled his cell out of his jacket pocket and dialed Triple A.

  “What year is your car?”

  “2007,” I replied as I sat on the hood of my car.

  “Okay, they’ll be here in 30 to 45 minutes. You want to go and sit in my car until they get here? I’m parked right over there and we’ll still be able to see your car from there.” He pointed in the direction of a row of cars.

  “Yes, thanks. I really appreciate this, Dr. Edmonds,” I said, sincerely.

  “No problem at all. I’m just glad that I was able to help…and you can call me Malachi,” he said, picking up his briefcase.

  “Okay, Malachi.” I blushed.

  As we started walking toward the row of cars parked under a sign that read “Doctors’ Parking Only,” Malachi pulled his keys out of his pocket and pressed the alarm button. I heard a chirp and the doors of a midnight blue Navigator unlocked. He walked to the passenger side of the SUV and opened the door for me, closing it after I was seated. His SUV was nice, but I couldn’t care less about what a man drives, especially if they look anything like Malachi. He could be on a BMX bike talking about, “get on the handle bars,” and I would hop on. With skin the color of caramel that looked as smooth as a baby’s bottom, he could be on a damned skateboard for all I cared. I’d hop right on his back and ride like that shit was normal.

  Malachi stood about six foot one with an average build. His jet-black hair was cut very low to his head. His goatee accentuated his beautiful, full lips, beautiful teeth, and dimpled smile. The small cut right above his left eyebrow added to his sexiness. He looked good enough to eat raw. He was beautiful and I was surprised that I hadn’t really paid much attention to him before now.

  “You all right?” Malachi asked, after hopping in the driver’s seat.

  “Yes, I’m fine thanks. How about you? Did you have a long day?”

  “Yeah, every day is long, but I like long days. It’s the short ones that I don’t like.”

  “Why do you say that?” I asked, not understanding his logic.

  “Well, I cherish every moment that I have on earth. As an emergency room doctor, I see people die almost on a daily basis, so I cherish every hour that I have. Plus, you age as every second goes by, so why would I want to rush that?” he asked, smiling.

  “That’s a good way to live life. I wish I could feel the same. There are some days that just don’t seem to end.”

  “Yeah, well, for me, it’s all about remembering things to be grateful for. When I was in med school, I wanted every day to be a short day.” There was a moment of silence and I could feel him staring at me. I looked at him and his gaze didn’t waiver though I was now staring back at him.

  “Why are you looking at me like that?” If I were any lighter, my face would be crimson. I knew I was blushing. My cheeks were too warm for me not to be. Malachi had that type of effect on me and it was all so sudden and surprising, to say the least.

  “I’m sorry…no, I’m not. Well, I am if I made you feel awkward,” he said, smiling that beautiful smile of his, “but, you’re breathtaking.”

  “Wow, breathtaking?” I asked, blushing.

  “Nothing but. No one’s ever told you that before?”

  “No, and I probably wouldn’t have believed them anyway.”

  “So you don’t believe me?” he asked, seriously.

  “To be honest, I don’t know you well enough to know if you’re just trying to flatter me or if you are being honest.”

  “There’s no need to try to flatter you. It doesn’t look like you’re lacking any confidence, and I can only keep it real. But I’m sure you know that you’re beautiful.”

  “That doesn’t really matter to me. I’ve never spent too much time worrying about how I look,” I replied honestly, looking at my watch. “Can I use your phone to call Simone? I know she’s worried to death right about now. I left my phone in the car…along with my keys.”

  “Sure.” He handed me the phone and I dialed Simone’s hospital room number. I’d come to remember it over the last few days.

  “Where are you?” Simone asked automatically, assuming it was me.

  “How’d you know it was me?”

  “Because everybody else knows that I should be home by now,” she laughed.

  “I locked my keys in the car. I’m in the hospital parking garage. Dr. Edmonds called Triple A for me, so we’re waiting for them to come and unlock the door,” I explained.

  “Oooh, we’re waiting? So that means you’re with fine ass Dr. Edmonds right now?”

  “Yeah the tow truck should be here in another 20 minutes, so I’ll be up there soon. Are you ready?” I asked, trying to change the subject.

  “Girl, yeah, I was born ready,” she said, laughing. “I’m watching the Maury Povich show right now anyway, and it’s funny as hell. I don’t know why anyone would go on a TV show to get a paternity test for millions of people to watch.”

  “I know, that show is full of drama. There’s the tow truck. I’ll be up there soon,” I said, before hanging up the phone. We got out of his truck and walked over to my car where the tow truck driver had stopped. He asked for Malachi’s card, filled out a form, and then handed it to him to sign. By the time Malachi finished reading and signing the slip, my car door was open.

  “Wow, that was quick.” I was amazed. Malachi handed the man his clipboard and we thanked him as he hopped in his truck and pulled off.

  “I can’t thank you enough,” I said to Malachi, after the tow truck driver hopped in his truck.

  “I’m used to getting a thank you and I usually don’t care too much about someone returning a favor, but will you do one for me and let me take you out? I’m so happy that you locked your keys in your car. Inside that hospital, I’m Dr. Edmonds, but I’m happy that I got a chance to introduce you to Malachi. I would’ve never asked you out while I was working. I believe in fate and that’s exactly what this is. I’ve been mesmerized by you since I first saw you in the emergency waiting room. I hope you believe that I’m telling you the truth. Say yes, because I just spilled my guts. Oh, damn. Do you have a man? I guess I should’ve asked you that first, huh?” he said, laughing.

  “Yeah, you probably should’ve asked me that first, but luckily, I don’t have a man,” I answered with a laugh.

  “So, can I take you out?” he asked again.

  “Why not?” I wanted to jump up, spread my arms out and do the splits in midair like cheerleaders do when their team scores. Calm down. Calm down, I kept repeating in my head.

  I grabbed my wallet out of my purse and pulled out a business card. I wrote my home number and cell on the back and handed it to him.

  “How about Sunday?” he asked, sounding hopeful.

  “Sunday sounds fine. Early afternoon or evening?”

  “Early afternoon sounds good. How’s 2:00 and we can make it a day?”

  “Sounds like fun.” I was so excited. I can’t remember the last time I felt this ecstatic over a date.

  “Okay, I’ll pick you up then. Put your address on the back of your card.” He handed my card back to me and I wrote my address on the back. I was already anticipating his arrival, although a bit prematurely.

  “Give me a call if you need directions.”

  “I’ll call you anyway. You have a good evening,” he said, walking away.

  “You, too, Malachi.” I couldn’t stop smiling. I felt so good. I would have never thought that I would be thanking God for letting me lock my keys in the car, but He sure knows what He’s doing.

  “Thank you, God,” I said, looking up at the concrete
ceiling. I reached inside the car, grabbed my keys off the passenger seat, closed the door, and skipped toward the elevator.

  Simone

  I stepped into the salon and locked the door behind me. I walked a few paces over to the black, U-shaped reception desk and took the mail out of the chrome mail holder. I noticed the light blinking on line one and wondered who could possibly be calling here this early. It was 6:00 in the morning and the only time I was able to have a few moments to myself in the salon. The last thing I was thinking about doing was answering it. Everybody knew I was here this early Wednesday through Saturday, so it could have been anyone.

  I walked around the camel hued walls that separated my beauty sanctuary from the outside world. As I looked around, I felt the calm you feel when you’re on some island lying on the beach in the sand—content. I flipped on a couple of lights and again realized how blessed I was to have my childhood dream materialize exactly the way I pictured it. Throughout the salon were beautiful ferns hanging from each corner of the earth toned painted walls. Each station was black with plush, camel toned, leather salon chairs that were as comfortable as your grandfather’s recliner. Overlooking each station, were individual skylights that emanated natural light throughout the day. Hanging on the wall that served as a partition from the front entrance of the salon was a 50” flat screen LCD HDTV. It hung where it could be viewed throughout the salon.

  Sanctuary was large enough to hold eight to nine stations, but I didn’t want to crowd the space. So I put in a total of six stations: two on the right side of the salon, two on the left side, and two upstairs. Six plush leather, dark chocolate recliners sat under hair dryers, which I placed back to back in the middle of the salon. The clients could either watch one of the stylists create as they sat under a lightly tinted, oblong skylight, or get manicures and pedicures by either of the two manicurists. Four black shampoo stations sat in the back of the salon against a camel hued wall near a doorless entry that lead to the pantry, two bathrooms, and my office. Up a winding staircase, my two barbers did their thing, cutting hair and entertaining their customers with a pool table and another 50” LCD HDTV, which stayed on ESPN. Two large couches were perfect for my barbers’ clients who liked to watch sports, relax, and kick back as they awaited their turn in the chair.